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Hollywood Style
If New York is the Big Apple, tonight Hollywood is the Big Nipple.
-- Bernardo Bertolucci
Wednesday, April 7, 1999
One year ago: Quotes
There were some new folks at the Century Ballroom tonight. Even though there may be a hundred or so people there each week, many of them unknown to me, I just realized that when I say new folks in this sense, I mean good dancers (or at least good to watch) that I don't know.
Anyway, I noticed two couples that I hadn't seen before. Both looked like Hollywood-style lindy hoppers to me. I did manage to dance with each of the leads before the night was done. One, Brian, has just moved to Seattle; the other one (I forget his name) was just visiting, I think.
It was interesting surveying the crowd from the sidelines. This Hollywood style is slipping into many folks' dancing in various ways. It's not easy to describe, but there's a different way of moving, more leaning away from each other and whipping around, maybe more like West Coast Swing. I don't see many people doing this exclusively, yet.
* * * * * * * *
One of the people on the Portland swing list posted about how he's feeling pressure because of follows getting upset when he doesn't get to dance with them all every evening.
I followed up this way:
I've been following (!) an interesting argument on the Swingin' Speakeasy, a web-based discussion that's mostly about the Boston swing scene. Some dancers were accused of being swing snobs and cliqueish, and of course they don't like that. I've seen similar threads on the Seattle list, too.
These human sensitivities! I know that I do have to consciously make an effort not to ascribe bad motivations to someone if I get turned down for a dance too often. ("He must not enjoy dancing with me!" "Darn those <insert your group> snobs!") This can be more difficult if I'm feeling tired, or emotionally fragile in other areas.
So far I've remained resilient enough to keep on dancing. I find other partners if someone consistently turns me down or I think they are making themselves unavailable (by doing the things I have done myself to avoid a partner that is uncomfortable to dance with, like avoiding eye contact, etc). I also only ask once per evening, for any particular partner.
I'm still at the point where if someone asks me to dance, it's a bonus and a nice treat. I can imagine the pressure if one were in demand for every dance, though! Here's what I contributed to the thread in the page linked above, which is also about breaking into a scene when everbody knows everybody but no one knows you:
"I've dealt with this by making a conscious effort to: take class at different places. (it's always ok to ask your classmates to dance when you see them, right?)
I attend various group practices. I started going to the Friday night practices of the Savoy Swing Club here in Seattle for the specific purpose of getting to know those leads, and having them get to know me.
But I agree that all this isn't easy, especially for shy, retiring types like us!
And to this I'd add that I'm learning to lead, which will double my chances to dance or be turned down!
We'll see if I live up to all this brave talk this weekend, when I plan to be in Portland, dancing with these strangers and attending a dance workshop. I'll be at Vicki Jean's bunnyfest, as well!
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